So there has been some big changes in my/our lives here in the past few weeks. Some of which that has prevented me from keeping up with my blog and even keeping up with my email. But most of those things are good. I don’t know which one to tell you first. So I guess I will start at the beginning, with the one you are more familiar with.
Those of you whom have been keeping up with my blog have know that I had to apply for SSI. You know I had court a week after my surgery last month and you know how you have to wait forever(about 4 weeks) for a decision. Two weeks again, 12 October, a Saturday, I received the judge’s decision.
So without further ado…the judge granted me a partially favorable decision!!! I will be receiving just under $800/month. You guys cannot fathom how much that is really going to help us out. Living on just my fiancee’s meager salary a month is killing us. This is such a huge blessing and I thank God for it everyday…and my great team of lawyers too ;)
So when I received that letter, I was all like>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Now onto the second. When I graduated from high school, three years later I went off to Iowa to attend Muscatine Community College in Muscatine, IA for Equine Science. This was the first time I had ever been away from home alone and I was gone for a year. In that time, I had my eyes(and my heart) opened to the fact that there was a whole other world out there of Christian denominations outside my Catholic upbringing. I wasn’t that stupid and narrow-minded to know that the Catholics were the only ones out there. My aunt and uncle are conservative Baptist and when I went to spend a couple weeks every summer with them, I would attend their church with them. Sunday morning service followed with bible class and then another class Wednesday evening. And I loved their church. I loved their teachings and the way their service made me feel. And I loved the way they required you to bring your bible, the KJV version(the only and only true one I believe) AND actually used and read word for word from the bible in their church service and spoke about the meaning of the scripture that they focusing on that week. Unlike the Catholics, who had a lecture read a few passages from the bible and the priest said a homily that really didn’t have anything to do with scriptures that were read. And my other mom and dad(my one friend I used to hang out with a lot, her parents ended up ‘adopting’ me unofficially and I still call them mom and dad to this day), my mom was a former Jehovah Witness. So I had been to her Kingdom Hall once or twice with her as a teenager. I didn’t like it at all. I don’t like their beliefs or anything that they do. Anyways, getting back to my time in Iowa. I attended a very nice church out there, a bible-based Baptist church. And at that time is when my curiosity of the Lord began and the Holy Spirit began to work on my heart. I yearned for more knowledge. But the year ended and I found myself back here and in a place of my own in town on my own. I searched high and low for a church that based their beliefs on the bible, that was conservative in their beliefs and small. And that is when I found the Mennonite church over in Bradford, PA. You guys would not believe how much I felt at home their. They had everything I wanted and craved spiritually, They fed my starving spirit and were so welcoming. The fellowship between them was so inspiring. It was a small congregation, maybe 50 or so people. 7 or 8 large families. And that is where I learned the real biblical truth about God and Jesus. I also adapted the way they dressed and one of my friends handmade me a couple dresses. I also began to cover my head. I was filled with the spirit. But I ended up moving to my fiancee’s house in the middle of nowhere and it was quite far from their church. Chris didn’t want me to wear the headcovering anymore and though we weren’t married yet, I knew I had to obey him. Now you are probably wondering why I moved in with him before we married. It was a matter of convience, really. My lease was up on my apartment and he had a place so we say it as economically sensible to move in together. So we did and such and such. I remained conservative in my matter and thinking and though I really missed the headcovering and what it meant to me, I went on. I did lax in my bible reading and studying, but I kept most of the Lord’s commandments and such. As for my taste of clothing, I fell into wearing jeans but I did wear skirts and dresses most of the summer when I should had been wearing them year-round.
Flash forward to today. The past week, I have had the heartstrings of my heart being pulled by the Lord to take up the bible and study it again and be more conservative and modest in my dress. So I have been wearing skirts and dresses despite the drastic change of weather. I also have been taking to wearing the headcovering again when Chris isn’t home. I really need to sit down and talk to him about that and other religious matters. The other night I did tell him that I do pray for him. He was like, why and what do you pray for me? It was like he was shocked I was praying for him. I also told him I pray for Justin too. I have been reading my bible early in the morning when I get up and before I go to bed. Things change and when you get older, you realize, hey, why did I digress? I should have been doing this the whole time for this is how it should be. I am in the world, not of it. The bible is the roadmap to how you should live your life.
I feel comfortable, at home, and at peace in a dress and wearing the headcovering. I can’t imagine why woman don’t anymore. There is so many arguments for wearing it. Look through history. What do 98% of the woman you see have on their head? A covering of some sort. There are so many other reasons too…
Idk. Maybe I am just old fashioned and conservative and set in my ways. Maybe my Mennonite brethren have it right. I feel they do. I feel right with God when outwardly, I am a walking testament of the Lord. Internally, my heart burns with the spirit of Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Idk…sometimes too I feel I was born in the wrong time period. Like I should have been born in the 1700s or even prior.
People may look at me weird and scoff at me or even laugh at how I dress and present myself, but I don’t mind. I have been told many times that I look Amish. I have a great admiration for the Amish for being steadfast in their ways in this modern time through the flurry of technological changes and such. How I would love to live that way, with some modern commodities such as running water and a flushing toilet and such. But I feel I would make it either way.
Anyways, as of right now, I am striving to be like the wife in Proverbs 31 to be a good wife and helpmeet to Chris when we are married. I am trying to listen to God as He speaks through the Bible as I study it. I am trying to learn the art of homemaking so that I can keep my home by biblical standards, happy, peaceful, and comfortable. Hey, you never know when you might entertain angels, right? :)
I am also trying to find out which direction my blog is going. Some days, I have writer’s block and I don’t know what to post. Partly because I don’t know who my audience is. Sure, I know my regular commenters, but other people, I have no clue. How can one have a blog if they have no audience or don’t know them? It’s almost like the question, how do I drive traffic to my blog? Stuff like that. So days go by before I come up with something to post and hope and pray it entertains and maybe even inspires at least one person. So until I find a focus for my blog and a target audience, I will just post random stuff as it comes to me. That is why I wish my audience would comment so I could get to know my readers.
So that is just a little update and a brief testimony about me. Thanks for hanging on and reading.
I welcome comments and interaction, so please feel free to leave a comment on this post and keep the conversation going. Thanks! :)